Strong At The Heart

vagina warriors

For those of you who’ve asked for more about the Vagina Warrior Awards, here is part of Sarah Page’s introductory remarks from Tuesday night:

“Welcome and thank you all for coming. Eve Ensler, author of The Vagina Monologues, writes, ‘Being a Vagina Warrior means developing the spiritual muscle to enter and survive the grief that violence brings and, in that dangerous space of stunned unknowing, inviting the deeper wisdom.’

“The three women we honor tonight, Cassie Burgess, Carolyn Lehman and Fox Olsen, embody what it means to be a Vagina Warrior. . . . The Vagina Warriors are integral members of our community, women working to end violence, striving to shed light upon a quiet darkness.

“The theme for our 2006 Vagina Warriors is ‘The New Revolution.’ The phrase, ‘New Revolution’ means that these women have a tireless and creative commitment to ending violence against all people. It means that they show their commitment to ending violence in our community in new and transformative ways.

“Another aspect our Vagina Warriors all have in common is their efforts to help young women and children. Every woman on this panel has helped give voices to young people, voices that might not have been heard had it not been for their efforts and dedication. Be it through novels and interviews and the written word, to being a homeless advocate and AIDS and HIV educator, to coordinating a sexual assault response team and being available for survivor support and welfare, these women are teaching and encouraging new generations of Vagina Warriors. They are watering seeds of change in our community and we are honored to have them here this evening to teach us more about their important and transformative work.”

What followed was an intimate and moving discussion of what it means to do social change activism in our community. Cassie was awesome talking about how she developed the SART team and what it is like to be with children, men, and women as they go through post assault forensic exams. She brought me and several others to tears. Fox is a tough and tender leader bringing families out of homelessness. You should have been there.

blog change

Now that I know that the registration process was a show stopper (thanks to those who told me!) I’ve changed the blog set up so that you can add your comments and see them right away without registering.

The reason for the registration was to filter out spam and creeps, but I was pretty much only hearing from people off-blog, so let’s try this and see how it goes.

Let me know what you think.

BTW, if you’ve never posted a comment on a blog before, you just click the “comments” button below this entry, then scroll down, and a box will appear where you can write what you want to say. Easy.

This weekend began for me on an island off the coast of Honduras and ended–after a long an adventurous trip home–on the stage of the Van Duzer theater at Humboldt State University.

The occasion was the V-day performance of Eve Ensler’s The Vagina Monologues. And the reason I was on stage, with two other women, was to receive recognition as Vagina Warriors. The award recognizes people in the community who work to end violence against women and children.

With me were Fox Olsen, the director of Arcata House, a transitional housing program in our home town, and Cassie Burgess who coordinates the Sexual Assault Response Team. Cassie is on call around the clock to respond with support whenever a sexual assault is reported. Both these women do amazing work in our community.

What a sweet experience to stand with Fox and Cassie and to have the support and congratulations of the exuberant cast of the show and the audience.

In 26 years in my community I’ve seen a lot of performances in the Van Duzer, from Geoff Hoyle and Joan Baez to Dell’ Arte and the Peking Acrobats. This was the first time I looked out at the house from the stage.

The proceeds from the annual V-Day theater piece go to local organizations that support survivors of physical and sexual abuse and promote healthy relationships and healthy sexuality.

This photo was taken by Shelley Mitchell from way back in the audience. The people are, from the left, Cassie Burgess, two of the directors of the show, Fox Olsen, and myself.

more

If you want to find out more about the work Cassie, Fox, and I are doing, we will be speaking at a reception this Thursday, 7-8 p. m. in the Green and Gold Room of Founders Hall on the HSU campus.

What an amazing experience. The day and a half in Bend, Oregon, was packed. Elaine Knobbs (Prevention Director at the KIDs Center) and I were at the TV studio by 6:30 on Tuesday for an appearance on Good Morning Central Oregon with Kristi Miller.

Elaine and Shellie Campbell lined up interviews on just about all the radio and TV stations in Central Oregon. Elaine told the story of bringing Darkness to Light (D2L) to the Tri County area and I talked about Strong at the Heart and why we were doing the event together at the library that night—a book discussion and launch for D2L.

Our message was clear: Child sexual abuse is at epidemic proportions in our country. Each one of us can do something to change this. Strong at the Heart shows the healing that can happen when survivors have knowledgeable support from family, friends, or community. Darkness to Light prepares us all to prevent and to respond appropriately to child sexual abuse.

In venue after venue, the individual stories in Strong at the Heart made the message concrete. Sheena’s friends helping her. Tammy telling her sister and aunt. Jonathan’s teacher acting on her suspicions that something was wrong and, later, Jonathan finding survivors like himself in SNAP. Akaya’s beautiful face graced the posters and announcements in the newspaper.

At 4:30 there was snow piling up on the road outside the hotel. I talked with KIDs Center director, Bob Smitt. The library staff were talking about calling off the event and going home. It looked like a Big Snow.

But the girls at Meadowlark, the local residential treatment facility, had earned the right to come to hear me talk. A group of high students, working on a film about teen-on-teen sexual violence, were coming from a town an hour’s drive away. Bob worked his magic with the library staff and we were on. The question was, would anyone make it through the snow to see us?

They did. The room was packed. Not only with the teens and their teachers and counselors, but with DHS workers, Darkness to Light facilitators, the town pediatrician, the chief of police, a lot of people who had heard about the event from radio, TV, and newspapers, and a whole group of women from Warm Springs Reservation who had driven an hour and a half to get there.

I began by telling people about my experience in a Darkness to Light training that very day (more about that later), then turned to the book. Projecting the photos—and others I’d taken working on it—on the wall behind me gave the audience a visual way into each story.

Because the event was the launch of D2L for the area, I focused my comments on the places in the stories where community, family, and friends played an important role—or failed to.

It was such a pleasure to talk with this attentive group about healing in community. I told the story of Hollow Water and how the people there turned to their traditional Ojibway oral history as well as to modern psychology to figure out how to deal with child sexual abuse within their tribe. The photographs from Smith College showed students educating their own community through tee shirt displays much like the one in the room with us.

People had such wonderful questions. It was a great to have a full hour and be able to answer in depth, giving the back story on some of the interviews.

One teen asked, “Were you ever sad doing this?” I started to give my usual answer (when people say, “Isn’t this a sad thing to write about!”) about being inspired by these stories of strength. But her question was deeper. “Yes. There were times in editing when I did feel overwhelmed by the cruelty that so many of us face as kids, sad at how people can hurt each other.” I thought some more. “With each one of these interviews there was a point where both of us teared up. It is a hard thing for all of us.”

Hard, but so good to have a plan, a response, and hope. So good to be working with others to change the “business as usual” way we’ve done things, which has left children and survivors vulnerable and alone. It doesn’t have to be that way. I saw real change that day during the D2L workshop, and saw how media and child advocates and school kids can work together.

I flew out the next morning feeling up lifted and sure. Things are going to be different in the Tri-County area of Oregon because enough good people care enough to take action. And they have a good, solid plan.